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Thank you, Anna, for including me on your lovely blog. What an honor it is.
Why title this Allowing God to lead the story? Because that is how my life had always been. As I grow older and wiser, I realize that God doesn't need me to be aware of it, but He leads my story. There is a song by Francesca Battistelli, Write my story. It resonates deeply with me, as I look at my life. God has always been leading me – whether I follow or not is another story.
I was not born into a Christian family. My parents lived through World War II and it left deep marks on them and my generation. As a child, I often felt God's presence near me. I didn't know who He was, didn't understand, but I knew I could trust Him (that changed over the years, sadly). I knew, somehow, to pray. We only went to church at Easter and Christmas, but somehow, God had touched my heart early on.
Life is always difficult, even for a kid growing up in Germany. So, early on, I learned to make up stories. I would basically make up stories when we were driving places, when I was trying to sleep, when I was playing with others. They would always be with me, entertaining me and keeping my interest.
I was fourteen when my family relocated to Dubai, in the UAE. I quickly learned that I had a talent for entertaining others, often making our guests sit through the skits I would perform. What got me excited was that they seemed to really like it. My father suggested I pursue something like acting or comedy. Being a shy person – other than when I performed my skits – I decided not to follow that career path.
Instead I went to college, met my husband, and started a family. Sill, I always had a certain story within reach. I became a horseback riding instructor, something that I now completely give God the credit for. Horses have always been a great passion of mine. I have passed this passion down to my oldest son who is a horseshoer. Talk about being a proud mamma.
While raising our kids, I pursued a master's degree in education and that was when God actively started to step into my life. I had thought I'd educate other people's children. Nope. God clearly directed me toward homeschooling. I struggled with obeying that one. As a German, you don't keep your kids at home! But a good friend was educating her own daughters and so ... I decided to step into that trust and lean on God.
It was the best decision I ever made.
With all this going on, you'd think I wouldn't have time for indulging in my fantasy world. Nothing could be further from the truth. My story thrived during this time. I was so overwhelmed often times, that I needed to go into my make believe place where I was completely in charge of what was going to happen because we all know how chaotic life can be.
God decided to tap my shoulder and ask me to trust HIM instead of a world of fantasy and adventure. That my own life was an adventure He was going to help me write. That was a hard one to follow, but I did. I put everything into trusting God, and He led me with a tender hand through what would be the most difficult time in my life. For the next two years, I completely put myself into His hand, while my husband of fourteen years went to Iraq as a contractor.
Our little family thrived like I couldn't believe. It was still hard. I wouldn't want to go through that time again. But God blessed it.
During that time, I was also writing a story for my pre-teen daughter – one she hasn't read and I don't think anyone else will either. I'm keeping that one locked away. When my husband came back home, we moved to Vermont to build our house up there. And we're still building 12 years later. It's almost done, though.
Another difficult time was in front of me and I knew where to put my trust. And you can imagine my surprise when things happened that I hadn't even imagined. I was finishing up my daughter's story (like I said, it's not for publication. It was practice). It was such a relief to write The End that I thought, Now what, God?
Please hear me ... loud and clear.
If you don't expect God to answer, don't ask a question. I nearly fell out of my chair when He answered (inside my heart, mind you) Write the story. I knew which story ... wasn't going to do it. Over the next three months, I argued with Him. Part of it was out of fear, part was to make sure that I didn't just make things up in my mind. It became obvious to me that God wanted me to write the story that had been my go-to when times were rough.
When I finally surrendered (oh, sweet surrender). It was like the song. I wanted Him to write the story. I wanted Him to lead my heart. I wanted Him to give me that message of love, hope, redemption, and forgiveness. He did, and so much more.
As I started to write, there were several things he revealed to me. I want to share them with you.
I am creative. I may not put together a beautiful bouquet of flowers or knit a sweater (please don't ask me to), but He has made me creative in my own way.
He created me for a specific task in mind. And He equipped me perfectly for it. All those papers and essays in college and grad school were leading to this one place. He was giving me a choice to step into this, this labor of love.
I was forgiven in full, paid by the blood of Christ. Not because I was so good and wholesome, but because Christ paid it all.
He was going to show me the way forward. All I had to do was to step out and allow Him to lead.
He was going to reveal Himself to me as I wrote. He was going to heal that which was still broken inside me to create the woman He wanted me to be.
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No, it's not been easy. But like surrendering to homeschooling, writing has been more of a blessing than I ever imagined. How is God writing your story today? Are you willing to give him the quill and ink? Give it a try and see what happens. I think you'll be surprised.
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Since that day, I've written a ton of stories. In the upcoming month of May, I will be publishing my 23rd full-length novel, Dare to Dream. I'm so honored and blessed that God would allow me to pen stories that shine the spotlight on HIS love and grace. (Anna's note: you can pre-order Dare to Dream for the special low price of $1.99. Click on the stunning cover pic to order from Amazon).
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Thank you again, Anna, for having me. You can find me on social media.
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